Thursday, December 6, 2012

Why I Cry

     I have just come from a wonderful journey of an assignment of the Lord writing a book called "The Woman at the Well."  It is at the publisher's as we speak.  I am excited to think the Lord could have brought me this far in my walk with Him that I should have the privilege to take His Word to the Nations.  During the course of writing this book it was a process of healing for myself as I wrote each word and contemplated what the Lord wanted me to learn and in turn teach other hurting women. 
     One revelation I came to learn about myself is that I cry.  I have always cried, I will always cry and most people misinterpret why I am crying so let me explain.

I cry because I feel your pain when I am physically close to you.  I have a gift of seeing into your very soul and feeling the emotions that you are going through.  This is a gift from the Lord not to invade your privacy but to let me know how and what to pray for you and to stand in the gap.

I cry because I feel the presence of the Lord and there is nothing more moving than feeling the love of God that can be overwhelming at times. 

I cry at church because I am so touched by the gentleness of the Holy Spirit and how the Lord comes and Heaven touches Earth when we worship Him with our whole hearts. 

I cry because at any moment the Lord can put someone on my heart whether they are near or far and give me the words to pray for them and stand in the gap. 

I cry because I feel the power of the Love that the Lord has for you. 

I don't cry because I am feeling sorry for myself, well not a lot anymore thanks to the Grace and Mercy of my loving Father in Heaven.  There is no need to cry for my own self.  I have been blessed beyond belief by the Father's protection and His peace. 

So in my past experiences I have been made fun of because I am sensitive and cry a lot, I have had  people who were supposed to love and take care of me, insult and ridicule me to the point of not being able to cry because I walled myself up and would not let myself cry.  Those days are over.  Through the course of writing down my most intimate moments in my life and the healing that has come from my relationship with the Lord, I have learned that its ok to cry.

There was a prophesy given to me a few months ago and I began to understand myself so much better. 
The person who gave me the prophesy said he saw two sets of towels one of each side of me.  The one set was wet and holding all the tears that I had cried over the years over God's business.  The other side contained dry towels of the many times I could have thrown in the towel and given up but didn't.  There was a single towel over me and that was God's covering.

So the next time you see me crying, don't think its because I have some pitiful life and I am feeling sorry for myself.  I am probably crying for you. 

Psalms 145:17 The Lord is righteous in all his ways
    and faithful in all he does.
18 The Lord is near to all who call on him,
    to all who call on him in truth.
19 He fulfills the desires of those who fear him;
    he hears their cry and saves them.
20 The Lord watches over all who love him,
    but all the wicked he will destroy.
21 My mouth will speak in praise of the Lord.
    Let every creature praise his holy name
    for ever and ever.